How have things changed since my surgery? In many-many ways. There are things that I can now do and that I wasn't able to do anymore and there are things that have gone away. I'm barely two months in and more than 50 pounds lighter and I already see a huge difference in all sorts of things. For example:
I can cross my legs while sitting.
I can walk up a few flights of stairs and not be totally out of breath.
I'm able to move without sweating profusely.
I can walk at a moderately fast pace without exerting myself and I can walk for an hour straight.
I can cut and paint my toe nails.
I can fit in to armchairs.
I can bend down to tie my shoes without almost choking and without dripping with sweat.
I can wear a skirt and not have my thighs rub against one another so aggressively that they become very irritated almost immediately.
I can buy clothes that fit.
I have enough energy to make it through the day.
I don't have to take medication for acid reflux anymore because it's gone!
I don't get constant headaches.
I have a lot less aches and pains in general.
My energy level and motivation are way up.
I can sleep better (the snoring has gone down).
I actually enjoy taking long walks with my dog. I'm looking forward to it!
I don't sweat as much for no apparent reason.
And I could go on and on and on. The point is, and I know I'm repeating myself, I'm absolutely thrilled I had the surgery because in the little time since the surgery and with only about 25% of my excess weight gone, I feel so much better. I feel better in general, both mentally and physically but I also feel a lot better about myself. I don't cringe when I look at myself in the mirror or when I catch a glimpse of my reflection in a window or whatnot. Before, I felt like a circus freak, now, I feel like myself.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Second post-op appointment
I went to my second post-op follow-up appointment with my surgeon yesterday. It was a very short appointment as I think the good doc was tired from operating all night and already late in his schedule at 10:15 am. They weighed me and I'm now down 53 pounds to 277 pounds (me very happy) and I saw the doctor for 10 minutes max, which was ok since I only had a few questions and everything is fine. I wanted to know if it was normal to feel like food gets stuck in my oesophagus from time to time and if my weight loss was on track. As for feeling like food get stuck, he says it's normal to get that feeling for the first six months and they don't really know why this happens - maybe inflammation but he didn't seem sure. Anyway, after six months, this inconvenient should completely disappear. As for my weight loss, he says that I'm a bit in advance to what can be expected (yeah baby!). So basically, I should keep doing what I'm doing. It's expected that I can't eat enough protein although I should still be watchful and the more exercise I do, the better, I can't really do too much. I'm currently walking 30 minutes almost every day with my dog. I'm realizing that I really enjoy these walks. Like last night, I was driving home after having seen two clients and I was feeling kind of moody because one of the client was more difficult (I'm a Psychologist) + I'm PMS-ing. So I got home still feeling a bit blue and, before, I would have found comfort in food, oh and was I craving comfort food. But I knew that I most likely wouldn't be able to find my usual comfort in eating given the restrictions imposed by the surgery. So I started to long for a walk. I really wanted to go for a long walk when I got home but figured that I wouldn't have the time. Anyway, long story short, I went for a short walk with the doggy and really appreciated it like I never did before. Having to quit food as my go-to fix is making me find other ways to cope with my emotions and feelings, which is just awesome!!!
I'm so insanely happy that I got this surgery, you have no idea!!
I'm so insanely happy that I got this surgery, you have no idea!!
Friday, October 15, 2010
The new improved (but still neurotic) me
Yesterday, I realized that I feel much better since the surgery. And I don't just mean physically although I would be lying if I didn't admit that six weeks post-op, I'm already feeling much more comfortable physically. I noticed that my mood is better, so is my motivation, my energy level and my general attitude. I don't really know if it's a placebo effect or what and to be honest, I don't really care because the end result is that I'm so much more happy this way than I was before, that I'm just hoping that this shall we say euphoria lasts a loooooooooooooong time!
I also wanted to talk about what's been going through my mind these past few weeks. I know it's going to sound a bit paradoxical but it's true nonetheless. I'm noticing more and more that I'm losing weight be it by touching myself and feeling that my body is different, trying on clothes that are now too big or trying on clothes that were too small and now fitting into them, looking at myself in the mirror, being able to bend in ways that I couldn't anymore, or simply crossing my legs while sitting. But at the same time, I'm obsessing about not losing enough weight. Like the other day, we were at my BF's sister's house and there was a scale. I don't own a scale and refuse to get one at home, yet, I was still curious to see how much weight I had lost since my last weigh-in. I was now down to 283. So around 13 pounds lost since September 13 (nearly four weeks earlier). My initial reaction to the reading on the scale was "Is that all?!?" and I was a bit dumbfounded and very disappointed. Then, I started to do all sorts of maths in my head and I perked up again by trying to reason myself. I can't lose 30 pounds each month, it would be unrealistic and unhealthy. I had started to eat more "normally" again after being on a liquid diet with tiny portions for a month now. So of course my weight loss would diminish. Now, I'm at the point where I want my surgeon's opinion. I'm seeing him for my second follow-up on Monday and I'm sure he'll weigh me. I'm very curious to know where I'm at now and what he'll have to say about it. Of course, I'll keep you posted.
Other things that have been happening to me: my tastes are starting to change a bit I think. And the reason behind that would be that I can't eat the same things anymore because they're making me feel a bit sick. I'm guessing this is the infamous dumping syndrome. And since I know I'm going to feel queasy if I eat these foods, I'm more hesitant to eat them. I don't think I ever had a full fledged episode of dumping syndrome but the tiniest bit of it that I felt was more than enough to be very aversive, believe you me!! As for my eating habits, I can eat pretty much anything but I think that foods high in sugar/starch or other carbohydrates tend to make me feel a bit sick. So far, I've tried rice, couscous, pasta and bread and the only one that I was able to tolerate was pasta. The worst one was rice and bread also tend to be more difficult. Anyhow, my cravings have more to do with fresh fruits and vegetables and protein. So for dinner, we always have some type of protein (fish, chicken, cheese, etc.), a vegetable and a carb and more often than not, I eat the protein, the vegetable but leave the carb.
I also wanted to talk about what's been going through my mind these past few weeks. I know it's going to sound a bit paradoxical but it's true nonetheless. I'm noticing more and more that I'm losing weight be it by touching myself and feeling that my body is different, trying on clothes that are now too big or trying on clothes that were too small and now fitting into them, looking at myself in the mirror, being able to bend in ways that I couldn't anymore, or simply crossing my legs while sitting. But at the same time, I'm obsessing about not losing enough weight. Like the other day, we were at my BF's sister's house and there was a scale. I don't own a scale and refuse to get one at home, yet, I was still curious to see how much weight I had lost since my last weigh-in. I was now down to 283. So around 13 pounds lost since September 13 (nearly four weeks earlier). My initial reaction to the reading on the scale was "Is that all?!?" and I was a bit dumbfounded and very disappointed. Then, I started to do all sorts of maths in my head and I perked up again by trying to reason myself. I can't lose 30 pounds each month, it would be unrealistic and unhealthy. I had started to eat more "normally" again after being on a liquid diet with tiny portions for a month now. So of course my weight loss would diminish. Now, I'm at the point where I want my surgeon's opinion. I'm seeing him for my second follow-up on Monday and I'm sure he'll weigh me. I'm very curious to know where I'm at now and what he'll have to say about it. Of course, I'll keep you posted.
Other things that have been happening to me: my tastes are starting to change a bit I think. And the reason behind that would be that I can't eat the same things anymore because they're making me feel a bit sick. I'm guessing this is the infamous dumping syndrome. And since I know I'm going to feel queasy if I eat these foods, I'm more hesitant to eat them. I don't think I ever had a full fledged episode of dumping syndrome but the tiniest bit of it that I felt was more than enough to be very aversive, believe you me!! As for my eating habits, I can eat pretty much anything but I think that foods high in sugar/starch or other carbohydrates tend to make me feel a bit sick. So far, I've tried rice, couscous, pasta and bread and the only one that I was able to tolerate was pasta. The worst one was rice and bread also tend to be more difficult. Anyhow, my cravings have more to do with fresh fruits and vegetables and protein. So for dinner, we always have some type of protein (fish, chicken, cheese, etc.), a vegetable and a carb and more often than not, I eat the protein, the vegetable but leave the carb.
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