Alright, still

So it's now been six months since I had my gastric bypass surgery.  Still elated, ecstatic, etc. about having had the surgery and the incredible results.  As you may have seen already, I am now down 113 pounds give or take and I would go as far as to say that I'm feeling better than I ever have in my life.  I have more energy, more drive, I love the way I look and feel, I'm way more active, I actually take pleasure in things that used to feel more like chores (for example, talking long walks with my dog).  Don't get me wrong, my life is far from perfect, I still have ups and downs but the downs aren't as frequent or low as before and the ups seem to come by more and more often, which is great.  Of course, it helps that I have an incredibly supportive entourage.  My boyfriend is super encouraging and he keeps telling me how beautiful I look, how proud he is of me, how happy he is to see me so upbeat and happy.  My friends and family keep telling me how great I look and even colleagues and acquaintances have commented on how great I seem to be doing.  I must say that I feel a whole lot more confident than I used to before and I think this emanates from my smile and attitude.

I still struggle with food issues (i.e. eating as a way to soothe or distract myself from unpleasant feelings) but I think that slowly but surely, I'm learning to cope in other, more adapted, ways.  I know that this surgery is only a tool and that it depends on me to make the most of it.  So I do need to work on my food issues, which I don't do enough because the weight keeps going down despite some excesses on my part.  I realize that this is not good and that I need to put a more focused effort in dealing with my addiction to food.  I really don't want to see the weight coming back in a couple of years.  But I also think that I need to give myself a break because it's only been six months and I'm still adapting to this new way of eating.  By the way, I can literally eat anything I want and I don't really feel restricted even though I eat a lot less since I'm still eating until I'm "full".  I won't stuff myself like I used to, that is to say that I'll stop eating way before I feel stuffed, but I still eat enough to feel satisfied as in not hungry anymore.  The hunger probably comes back sooner than before since I eat less.  My tastes are also continuing to change.  Like earlier, I had a craving (yes, a craving, I wasn't hungry) for something sweet.  So I ate 4 pieces of chocolate.  And you know what?  I actually didn't enjoy the chocolate and should have stopped after I ate the first two pieces but I still ate the other two pieces (this is what I mean when I mentioned my issues with food - eating when not really hungry and continuing to eat even though I don't really feel like it).  Still, before the surgery, I would have eaten a lot more than 4 pieces of chocolate (at least one bar, probably two and maybe more) and I would most likely would have greatly enjoyed eating it/them.  So now, I find myself often craving fruits or veggies or meat, which are basically the foods that I should be eating.  And since eating something to fatty and/or to sugary (but mostly something fatty AND sugary) makes me feel sick (i.e. tired and nauseated), I'm craving those types of food less and less.  So the only foods that I don't eat anymore are foods that tend to make me feel sick.  Otherwise, I can eat bread, pasta, rice, raw and cooked veggies, fruits, meats, fish, etc.  So far, I haven't found a food that won't pass.

And to finish, here are a few things that I can do now and that I couldn't do before:

Fit my ass into armchairs
Sit with my legs crossed
Give myself a pedicure
Walk up a flight of stairs without being out of breath
Walk at a fast pace
Jump around
Run
Stand for long periods of time
Shop in regular stores and buy regular size clothes
Wear heels
Buckle the seat belt on airplanes
Fit in the seat on airplanes
Wear skirts or dresses without chafing my inner thighs to death from them rubbing against one another